This Is Expensive

Owning a car has become so expensive recently. It’s been growing in price over the past few years, but increased to a ridiculous, unsustainable, unfair amount over the past two weeks. I’ve basically been driving around the whole city trying to find a petrol station that’s offering unleaded for less than two dollars. And not …

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Floral Paper Questions

Around the world, people know Australia for several reasons. For starters, we’re known for our general friendliness. We’re the kind of people you want to meet when you’re touring through Asia. We’re also known for our, uh, rowdiness. If that’s what you want to call it. But honestly? I think the main reason we’re known …

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Matching Couple Tattoos

My boyfriend broke up with me last week. He said he’s moving interstate to be with a woman he’s only ever spoken to online. They met on one of those internet dating websites two months ago and he’s already sent her several thousand dollars. I feel like it’s a scam. Oh well. If he wants …

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A Pre-Dinner Surprise

‘Uh… honey?’ ‘Ya?’ my wife poked her head around the corner, the sound of dinner cooking coming from behind her. ‘What’s up?’ ‘Have you seen this?’ I asked, brandishing the opened envelope I’d found on our hall table. ‘Oh yeah, I meant to show that to you,’ she smiled, stirring a bowl in her hands. …

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Rocky Bathroom Repairs

A meteor crashed into my mansion last week. Sounds crazy, right? I didn’t believe it either. I wasn’t home when it happened (I was visiting my third beach house on the coast), and neither was my family, or my team of over fifty maids and servants. My neighbour rang me in hysterics, screaming madly about …

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