Cars

Driving Around Australia

I’m gearing up to beat the world record for the shortest amount of time that it’s taken someone to drive around Australia. As it stands, the record is 5 days, 13 hours and 43 minutes and I’m in a better position than anyone to be able to beat it.  I’ve only taken a week and …

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Expensive Car Service

Two days on from finding my girlfriend with another man and I have not yet recovered. The last time I saw her was in my rearview mirror as I was speeding as far away from the scene of the crime as possible. She had her hazards on and was pulled over to the side of …

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Embarrassing Car Service

There’s nothing better than Friday afternoon. The office is buzzing with talks of weekend plans, people are getting restless looking at the clock and the drinks start flowing at 4pm. With the weekend on the horizon, everyone is in a good mood. It’s pretty elite. This Friday started out great, just like all the others. …

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Gone Standard

I never thought I’d be the type to drive a middle-of-the-road sedan, let alone white one with a bog standard interior and enhanced safety features. I mean, come on… who needs a thing that beeps when you start drifting out of your lane, except people who shouldn’t be driving in the first place? And yet, …

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Mechanical Painting

I went to a mechanic today, but they couldn’t do what I wanted them to. It was pretty frustrating because I’ve been told by the video game Big Steal Car that mechanics can give paint jobs; all you have to do to get a colour change in the game is drive into a mechanic’s garage …

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The Driving Stuntman

This is it. The greatest stunt of my career. I can’t be sure that Bessie or I will survive, but we have to try. The people, they’re out there, waiting to be blown away by our show. Avoiding missiles while driving? They’ve seen us do that a thousand times already. Driving over shark tanks with …

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